to thy sweet self too cruel

In a reply to the "stay at home mom guilt" email I discussed the other day, someone said "Thank you [redacted], for posting that it is ok to be a stay-at-home mom in the face of sometime guilty feelings brought about by moms who do work outside the home." Huh? Amazing how direct that was-- the guilty feelings those working moms purposefully inflict on us! Oh, how I would love to esplain to this woman how guilt works. But I am being the wise (if rusty) yogini. Namaste.

I suppose both sides of this issue see the other as the enemy, when in fact (I believe) we're all just trying to stay afloat. But maybe my view is colored by the fact that my own mother was "stay-at-home" so it seems normal to me. I was shocked a few years ago when she shared some of the criticism she endured from working mothers. And there is certainly a "shame shame" aspect to the many articles about hypereducated women "opting out."

And what prompted me to raise the working mom issue in response to the "stay-at-home mom guilt" email--triggering snark from both sides--was that the argument put forward in the article that originated the email thread, making the case for the importance of stay-at-home moms--necessarily implies that working moms are doing their kids a disservices. So either stay-at-home moms have to accept that they are doing it for themselves, not their kids, or working moms have to accept that their kids are being shorted, in order for the two sides to come to some agreement on the way the world turns. Not gonna happen. Better to avoid the subject entirely.

Does going on ebay just to look around ever end well? I should not be spending money right now, but Nugget has a brand spanking new backyard and no outdoor toys, and a particular obsession with the Little Tikes Cozy Coupe -- the red and yellow car that celebrated its 30th anniversary this year. He used to "borrow" one from my mom's neighbors (with her complicity of course) and has thirsted for his own ever since. The other day he noticed one in the driveway of a house on the next block, and was immediately all, "My go there? My go there now? Noooooowww!!!!" It really cracks me up when he thinks getting louder will be persuasive. He is not amused. So I am bidding on one now, after going on ebay "just to see what's available." My spend money now? Nooooowwww!!!!

There is more I wanted to write about but my implacable alarm clock will be screaming "Mommy ouuuuutt!!" in approximately 7 hours, if I'm lucky.

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